Poem #135
I Want to Write
9.12.08
I am confused, having a lot to say
Don't really know the right way
To express all what's going on
And everything that's been done
A lot of feelings, a lot of emotions
A lot of sadness, a lot of notions
Buzz, achievements, success
And making great progress
But still, it's like wanting to run
Not feeling like having any fun
I want to hold a paper and write
Wishing to feel everything is alright
I want to cry and be held
I want to scream and be heard
Hoping to be hidden away from life
Coz it keeps stabbing like a knife
What's this silly life all about?
A bunch of days that fill us with doubt
Making us worried about tomorrow
Giving us hopelessness and sorrow
Stealing our ambition and dreams
Driving us to dead extremes
It's all in vain let me tell you
Love is the only thing that's true…
It will give us power to defeat
All hatred, revenge and deceit
But where is this love? Is it here?
Will it ever come so near?
Will it ever give me poems to write,
Filling me with excitement and delight?
What is it that we are all searching for?
Wanting to be cared for? Or is there more?
The ambiguity of life, its mystery and all
When will all these mighty walls fall!
Are we supposed to feel okay?
Will these rocks get out of the way?
I am tired of stumbling and getting up
I am strong but I am just fed up
Life is simply a series of waves
Choose to be a hero, or one of its slaves
But remember the burden to be carried
All the sadness that can't be buried
You choose a way, you can't go back
And you don't know what will attack
You sacrifice, you fall and once more
Wish that there could be any door
That would open to your land of dreams
Where everything is full of bright gleams
Where the scent of love fills the air
That spreads happiness with no despair
Where is the door to this land?
Is it even real or is it just a dream of sand?
That collapses when the wind blows
And when you wake up, it's nothing but hopes
Of which none has come true
Then life goes on, you try to find a way through…